Self-Confidence

Hi friend,

“Self-confidence, we sense, is the result of alchemy. It arises from a combination of factors. The routes leading us to it are various, but once we’ve acquired it, it supports each of us in the same way. There is only one self-confidence, but there are a number of ways to get there.” - Charles Pépin

I used to think that self-confidence was something that the greats were born with—something that came naturally. Whether it was watching Kobe play basketball effortlessly or hearing The Beatles’ songs, it seemed like an inborn gene: to be good at what they do and being super self-confident about it.

As I grow older, I realise that self-confidence is a skill that can be practised and perfected over time. It’s not something you’re born with—it’s something you develop.

According to Charles Pépin’s book, Self-Confidence, your self-confidence is determined by three factors:

1. Confidence in someone else

2. Confidence in your own capabilities

3. Confidence in life

You build self-confidence by:

• Keeping the promises you make to yourself

• Feeling confident enough to trust someone else

• And most importantly, believing in yourself

Want to boost your self-confidence? Here are some ways on how to do it:

1. Change your self-talk

   What are the words that you are constantly repeating to yourself?

   Most often we tend to say phrases like, “I’m not good at this”, “I can’t do it”, or “I don’t feel confident enough.”

   It’s no surprise then that our actions reflect our self-talk. We feel underconfident, don’t perform well, and then contemplate what went wrong.

   If you want to feel more confident, start by changing your self-talk.

   Say and feel the words you want to experience in your reality.

   
   

2. Take consistent and focused action towards your goals

   Taking action builds confidence. One of the many reasons why you’re not feeling confident is because you don’t live up to the promises you make to yourself.

   If you say you’re going to do something, do it.

   This builds a loop of confidence that keeps repeating itself the more you show up, work and keep your word.

   As you continue to do this, you add more evidence and proof that you can back yourself with.

   
   

3. Learn from your mistakes and dare to try again

   Legends feel the fear and do it anyway.

   If you’re too afraid to try, you’ve already failed.

   Be bold enough to make mistakes and wise enough to learn from them.

   Trying again requires resilience and resilience boosts your self-confidence.
   

You don’t build self-confidence overnight. It takes time and practice.

Be patient and trust yourself.

Love always,

Deveshi x